Responsibility

Truthfully I cannot spell to save my life, ugh

Hello interwebs! It’s 2020 the time when you make resolutions to change your life. Whether you’re deciding to go to the gym, trying to complain less, or simply wake up to your alarm today is the day to change. Yet, as time progresses through 2020 (where supposedly it is acceptable to wear tailored suits) you will stop your resolutions or you may amp it up by finding an accountability partner. All the while this is simply a means to not fully put the responsibility on yourself. The accountability partner just isn’t good enough or outside circumstances forced me to become more lazy or less enthused about the gym.

As an individual the only person responsible for change is you. No fad diets, no easy 123 planners will assist you in changing only the personal assertion that screams, “I will” will you than change.

For me it is to actually enjoy life. For the last 6 years I’ve been in a rush from one place to the next, not acknowledging certain things that need to be addressed nor allowing myself to live. I owe it to myself to live. Despite life occurances (hitting a deer in June) or not being accepted by peer groups that is inconsequential to the overall goal, have a life. How one reaches that point is accepting themselves for who they are not what they are lacking. To assist in changing this view point I’ve decided to limit social media for the unforseeable future. It is to easy to compare yourself to others online.

I’ve decided to write more and be intentional in my writings. I enjoy story-telling and have a vivd imagination that when properly trained could produce something quite extrodinary. I’m a capable athelitc and will attend a powerlifting meet by the age of 28. I think through self-acceptance and rasing self-worth will I eventually find Mrs. Right.

Perhaps also in the near future I’ll obtain a puppy. Move to a house and pay off student loans.

Nobody is responsible for where I am mentally, emotionally, or physically. Life events are a product of how one acts, reacts or fails to act.

Simply act and hold fast to the personal truth of, “I will” and skies the limit.

What If

What If We Caused Loneliness?

What if all preconceived notions on social interaction were bullshit? What if instead of remaining in contact over Facebook or Instagram we’re really craving authentic, real-life, in the flesh relationships with others? What if social media was a band-aid instead of a cure or loneliness.

Social media is the easiest way to reach millions of individuals. A marketing dream. We as a society have become tunned to our phones as a mother is able to hear the cry of her child in a crowd. It is to easy to become influenced by the pressures of marketing and be caught up in a cycle of need. Further pressure is put upon a person when an influential celebrity endorses the product.

Has social media caused a societal need to be keeping up with the Joneses? Are we so obsessed to be a certain way that it is difficult to come to grips with our self-image?

Seeing others succeed further frustrates or emboldens a person.

Social media can be useful in creating a tribe if used appropriately. It, however, has only further separated individuals due to the ease one can acknowledge or ignore a person.

Happiness

I was asked to write this by my therapist. Forgot to bring it!

Happiness, is dependent upon the mindset of a person.

I’ve known little children in Mexico to be happy simply becuase they have a specific toy or they were able to hang out with American kids.

I think as children we are familiar with that happinesss is, I remember being whappy when I was younger. I’d play video games or read nonstop.

Going outside and playing on the swing set with my sisters. Getting yelled at by the next-door neighbor who was odd but he had dementia.

Taking family trips to Grandas or the opposite side of the country since Dad knew everybody in the church setting.

Yet, I think happinesss can become fleeting as it ebbs adn flows based on other factions. Emotions are like the tide, they come in during the highpoint and it seems to stay for a while but it recedes.

Bills pile up, work becomes stressful, or a lack of that one “thing” may cause a person to be unhappy. Being overwhelmed can cause anyone to become unhappy.

What would it take for me to be “happy?” Recogntizing that I am who I am and that is alright, nothing has to be perfect. We compare ourselves as a result of the consumeristic society we lice in. I am content at work, perhaps even happy. This happiness is a result of not having to engage my brain and working through the miniature problems of work. Complete silence and zero interaction with soemthing would caue me to be unhappy. I don’t take days off well. I find myself in a better mood when engaged with something meanginful to remotely meaningful, like video games.

At the end of it all, it is a mindset. There isn’t a point to revist the past, reflecting on it is depressing, and pointless.

Much like this pencil joke… I shouldn’t tell it, it has no point.

Writing well, writing consistently

I’m unsure why but I love to write.

Yet, sitting here I’ve got nothing. No drive or a lighting strike of creativity. What does it take to continue to write, day in and day out?

I think a lack of creativity is a result of inner conflict. The desire to go forth and create comes from the soul. When I am upset, I go to the gym, and I’m later able to focus. If I don’t leave it all at the gym I truely cannot contribute to a personal hobby.

Yet, I also think to write well and write consistently one has to approach it like working out.

See what I did there?

My personal goal is to write and post every other weekend.

Two weeks from now I shall be in Nebraska but I plan on having something posted Sunday evening at 5pm central time.

Stay tuned 🙂